Preparing for Separation and Divorce – Getting Started
When a relationship becomes impossible, whether it is your decision, your partner’s or a joint realisation, the prospect of family change is a daunting one. There is now a bewildering array of information available and a variety of services to choose from.
We are experts and can offer you the relevant information, support, legal advice or mediation, so that you can start to make the decisions that are right for you and your family, to keep you in control of your separation or divorce and plan for the future.
Getting Started: we meet with you to understand the issues that are important to you, your goals, the right process, the legal framework, preparing effectively, your budget and funding.
Your Children: will be at the centre of your concerns and we will put your children first, plan how to parent and communicate effectively now and in two homes.
Financial Preparation: understanding, gathering and exchanging your financial information is essential in all processes. Expert advice and reports may need to be arranged.
Agreeing Solutions: we will look at options that meet family goals in one of the following processes:
Personal Negotiation: You may do this face to face, by email, with the help of a trusted person or with the help of technology.
Task Specific Legal Advice: Your circumstances may be that you prefer to have a meeting to review particular issues or to prepare documents or implement agreements. This may be advice during mediation, review of financial information, coaching for personal negotiations or mediation.
Mediation: We can offer Mediation and Mediation and Information Meetings. Lisa Broddle is an Accredited Mediator. The Mediator will set an agenda, deal with financial disclosure and manage the mediation process, help both partners listen and have their chance to speak in a respectful way, summarise, clarify, test and explore options in a flexible, problem solving way, provide legal and practical information, indicate what independent legal advice is needed, manage next steps, produce Open Statement of Financial Information and Without Prejudice Memorandum of Understanding to make into an order or agreement with independent legal advice.
Collaborative Separation and Divorce: GROWing Apart Successfully. There is a common goal to resolve arrangements for the future for the benefit of the whole family working with your partner and the two collaborative lawyers to find a solution in meetings where all the mediators’ skills are used with legal advice and implementation of the agreement, providing a seamless process.
Solicitor Negotiation: Mediation or The Collaborative Divorce is not suitable for everyone. Where you need to have more separation from your partner, negotiations in the traditional method either by correspondence, telephone calls or meetings may be the best solution for you.
Court Application or Arbitration: You may decide that you and your partner are so apart in your views that a negotiated agreement is simply not possible and you may prefer the court to decide at the outset or if one of the other processes has not achieved an agreement. Arbitration is a private legal decision and can be used if you and your partner agree to use this process.
Personal Preparation: however you resolve your separation and divorce you need to be aware there are repeating stages in the Loss Cycle: Denial; Anger; Bargaining; Depression and Acceptance. There may be a sense of relief that your relationship has ended or failure because you were powerless to stop it from ending. The changing strong emotions of distress, anger, inertia, paranoia, grief, fear of change, rushing ahead, loss of worth, confusion, guilt and punishment. We provide sensitive and clear advice, information and referrals to family consultants, helping you recognise the behaviours, moving at your pace to acceptance and achieve awareness in your decision making.
Whichever process you decide to use, make sure that you prepare for the best outcome with specialist independent legal advice. The money you spend is an investment in your future.
If you would like to speak about the issues raised in this article, please contact Lisa Broddle, our Accredited Family Mediator, who will be able to answer any questions you may have. Please call 020 8891 6141 or e-mail firstname.lastname@example.org.
Working together to achieve a “Good Divorce”
The Right Team and the Best Advice